It was at a very young age that discovered that not all girls were stinky, and had cooties.  From my earliest days of not knowing exactly what I was feeling, to my pre-pubescent crushes, to those I thought about when I…anyway.

Here are just of the few that I have loved over the years.  Perhaps they will bring back fond memories for you too.  Though, if you’re just discovering these ladies for the first time, well…


Samantha Fox

Samantha Fox sang songs like Naughty Girls Need Love Too, Touche Me, & I Wanna Have Some Fun.  She made posters like the one above, and others wearing nothing that were advertised in the back of Hit Parader magazine.  She was one of the first widely talked about older women in late elementary and middle school.  We all wanted her.  We all had to have her.  None of us ever would.  These days she’s a Born Again Christian and is in a civil partnership with her manager Myra Stratton.  If only we knew about her orientation all those years ago – I think our little balls would have exploded.


Christina Applegate

She burst onto the scene playing Kelly Bundy on Married With Children.  The image above was one of the first posters of a famous girl that I’d ever purchased only a few years before I knew what I could use it for (in other words, I was about 10 – get it?)  She went on to a successful movie career, and helped launch the Pussycat Dolls.  Today she plays movie moms – MILFS, really.  She may not be the poster girl she was all those years ago, but I still get a little excited when I see her name in movie credits.

Olivia Newton John

It all started with Let’s Get Physical and Magic.  Then I saw her in Grease.  The creepy thing is she was probably around my mom’s age at the time.  Weird.  Now, Magic is being used in Macy’s commercials, and every time one comes on I think of Olivia.  My wife looks over at me with that “What the Hell?” look on her face.  She’ll never understand.

Wonder Woman (Linda Carter)

Wonder Woman was my first childhood crush before I even knew what a crush was.  Linda Carter filled (out) the role perfectly.  Though, now that I look at the photo those hot pants look more like adult diapers.  Don’t you think?  Though, I am looking forward to the upcoming Wonder Woman movie, I will always love the original.

Lita Ford

Lita Ford first stepped into the spotlight alongside Joan Jett in a little band called The Runaways.  I didn’t notice her, however until her 3rd solo album, Lita was released in 1988.  In her hit song, Kiss Me Deadly she sang about (not) getting laid, and fighting while slithering around in spandex.  She was the hottest rock chick with big hair, boobs, and a tush that could stop traffic until Vixen came along a year or so later.  Today at 52 she’s still rockin, and is newly divorced.  I think I may have a shot.

Susanna Hoffs

The Bangles were that girl band that looked like girls, but rocked like men, until they didn’t and just became girls, if that makes sense.  Front woman, Susanna Hoffs was the hottest of the bunch to sing Walk Like an Egyptian, and eventually my favorite of theirs, Eternal Flame.  She had a brief acting career as well, and eventually married director Jay Roach of Austin Powers fame.  Today she looks even better than she did in the 80’s.  Chance?  Hell no.

Christie Brinkley

Finally, one of the many reasons to watch National Lampoon’s Vacation was this little strumpet driving around in a red Ferarri, trying to seduce Chevy Chase.  They eventually meet in a small motel bar, and go naked swimming.  At that point I thought Clark W. Griswold was the luckiest man alive (Beverly D’Angelo was a dish at the time too.)  I never understood her marriage to Billy Joel – the assumption was that he was just a really cool guy.  Today we know he’s a drunk, but still awesome.  Their relationship ended, and she’s had a couple other marriages end in divorce since.  Shame, considering she was once the hottest supermodel to ever grace the magazine covers and silver screen.  I still think she’s hot at 57.

~Sam

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